Life story work
At a glance
- It’s about belonging, not just a book: Life Story work helps children who have faced many changes understand who they are, where they come from, and how they fit into their world.
- Carers are the primary story-catchers: While caseworkers set up the framework, carers are best placed to capture the small, everyday "happy times," photos, and milestones that happen at home.
- The child leads the way: The child is the expert on their own life; they decide what goes in the book and who is allowed to see it, ensuring their right to privacy is always respected.
- Honours every part of their identity: A complete story includes a child's unique cultural heritage, language, and religious traditions, using resources like the Aboriginal-specific version of the My Life Story Book where appropriate.
- It builds a bridge to the future: By honestly and gently recording a child’s history—including the difficult parts—you help them develop the self-esteem and trust they need to grow into strong, confident adults.
Helping children understand their story
Children in care often go through many changes—where they live, who they live with, and where they go to school. These changes can make them feel confused about who they are or what has happened in their lives.
Children in care often go through many changes—where they live, who they live with, and where they go to school. These changes can make them feel confused about who they are or what has happened in their lives.
Building a My Life Story Book is a way to gather and keep special memories and information. It helps children:
- Understand their identity: It connects the dots of their life so they know where they have come from.
- Grow emotionally: It provides a safe way to process their feelings.
- Keep their history: When they become adults, this book becomes a precious record of their childhood achievements and experiences.
The most important part of the book is a gentle history of the child’s life, from when they were born to right now. What goes inside depends on what information is available and, most importantly, what the child wants to include.
You can help them collect:
- Photos: Print photos from your phone of the child, their family, friends, and pets.
- Memories: Drawings, report cards, awards, and certificates.
- Connections: Letters from their Mum, Dad, or other family members.
- Places: Pictures or postcards of homes they’ve lived in or places they’ve visited.
- Culture: Information about their family tree, religion, or cultural heritage.
Planning
People who can help with life story work include the child or young person, a caseworker, the carer, a counsellor and sometimes family members. These people can have different roles depending on the task or may work with the child or young person on certain parts of their life story.
Make it clear who will be responsible for the roles of:
- structuring the life story work
- preparing the child or young person for life story work
- collecting information
- asking the child or young person who they would like to have work with them
- maintaining the life story work once the My Life Story Book (PDF 1.65MB) is compiled
While a caseworker usually starts the process, you play the biggest role because you see the child every day. You have the best chance to capture the small, happy moments that happen at home.
Even if a child is only staying with you for a short time, helping them with their book is vital. It helps them see that their time with you is a meaningful part of their journey.
A Note on Privacy: The child is the only person who decides who looks at their book. Please respect their privacy and ensure the book stays in a safe place.
Ways You Can Support Them
- Move at their pace: Some children may feel overwhelmed by their history, so let them lead the way and only work on the book when they feel ready and comfortable.
- Be a quiet listener: The most helpful thing you can do is listen to their questions. If you don’t have all the details—like what happened during their "baby days"—you can ask your caseworker to help find those missing pieces.
- Hold space for all feelings: It is important to celebrate the joyful milestones, but it’s just as vital to sit with them through the more difficult parts of their story.
- Use gentle, honest language: If there are tough truths to include, such as why they couldn't stay with their family, work with your caseworker to explain these in a way that is safe and non-judgmental.
- Respect their privacy: Remind them that their book is confidential and agree on a safe, private place to keep it.
- Keep their story with them: Always ensure the book travels with the child so their history stays with them whenever they move to a new home.
Why This Matters
Creating a Life Story Book is about more than just collecting photos; it’s about building a foundation for a child's future.
- Building trust: Working on the book together helps create a stronger bond and deeper trust between the child, their carer, and their caseworker.
- Strengthening identity: Learning about and accepting their past helps a child develop a clearer sense of who they are and improves their self-esteem.
- Bridging the gap: The book helps maintain a connection between carers and parents, providing a shared history that is especially healing if a child returns home.
- Sorting fact from fiction: Making the book helps a child understand the reality of their journey and clears up any confusing "make-believe" ideas they might have.
- Encouraging big questions: It provides a safe space for children to ask things they might have been worried about before, such as why they are in care or what their parents are like.
- Honouring their roots: It ensures that vital details about the child’s unique culture and religion are respected and recorded for the future.
DCJ has developed the download My Life Story Book (PDF 1.65MB) (PDF 1.65MB) as a tool for guiding children and young people in care to record their life story in a way they can understand. There is also a downloadable version of the book designed specifically for Aboriginal kids in care (PDF 11.61MB) (PDF 11.61MB)
The memory jar idea
What it is: A physical jar where you and the child "catch" happy moments, achievements, or funny stories as they happen.
Why it works: It builds a bridge between everyday life and the My Life Story Book. It also helps a child feel valued and seen in the present moment.
How to start
- Find a Jar: Use any clear container (a clean jam jar or plastic tub works well).
Decorate Together: Let the child make it theirs. Use ribbons, stickers, or glass markers. This is the first step in claiming their story.
- Prepare the "Scraps": Cut up small pieces of colored paper. Keep them in a bowl next to the jar with a pen.
Ways to fill the jar
- The "Small Wins": When the child tries a new food, learns a word in their home language, or has a great day at school, write it down and pop it in.
- The "Photo Scraps": If you take a great photo on your phone, write a quick note about it (e.g., "Today we went to the park and saw a dog that looked like Inspector Clouseau") and put it in the jar until you can print the photo for their book.
- The "Weekly Ritual": Once a week, ask the child: "What’s one thing from this week you want to remember?".
Moving from Jar to Book
Every few months (or when the jar is full), sit down together and go through the scraps.
- At their pace: Let the child choose which memories they want to glue into their My Life Story Book and which they want to keep in the jar.
- Acknowledge the journey: This is a safe time to talk about their "current arrangements" and how they are growing while in your care.
- Take it with them: If the child moves to a new home, the jar and the book go with them, ensuring their "community of care" stays connected to their history.
DCJ developed a version of the My Life Story Book specifically for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander children. It is designed to help them grow up strong by celebrating their culture and keeping them connected to their family, kinship groups, and community.
This version focuses on the things that help a child understand who they are and where they fit in their community:
- Who am I?: A space for their personal details, like their birthday and all the things that make them unique.
- My family, my mob: For recording their parents, siblings, clan, and extended family, as well as where their mob comes from.
- My culture: A place to hold onto their Nation’s name, flags, totems, language words, and role models.
- My future: Information about Aboriginal services and networks to support them as they grow older.
Making the story their own
Every child is different, and some may prefer to keep their story in a scrapbook, a special treasure box, or even through videos. You can help them collect meaningful items such as:
- Photos of family, pets, holidays, and the places they have lived.
- Important records like their birth certificate or school reports.
- Creative pieces like drawings, artwork, and awards for music or sport.
- Personal mementos like letters, postcards, and family trees.
Finding the right information
Building a cultural life story is a journey. It’s important to include details about the child’s community and heritage by talking with the people who know them best:
- The child and their family: Listen to the child, their parents, and their extended family.
- Community voices: Reach out to Aboriginal workers, Elders, leaders, and community organisations.
- Exploration: You can also learn together by visiting libraries, attending cultural camps, or going to Aboriginal art and music events.
🔗 download My Life Story Book - Aboriginal version (PDF 11.61MB) (PDF 11.61MB).
Every child is given a copy of theMy Life Story Book when they enter out-of-home care. For children from diverse backgrounds, a key part of this journey is gathering and maintaining information about their cultural and religious heritage.
This record is a gift for their future self, providing a clear map of their childhood experiences, achievements, and identity as they grow into adults.
Honouring Traditions and Milestones
Many cultures have special rituals or milestones that celebrate a child reaching a certain age or level of maturity. You can work closely with your caseworker to ensure these important moments are recognized and observed, helping the child feel seen and respected.
Connecting with Family Roots
Understanding where their parents and extended family come from helps a child feel grounded in their own history. You can help by gathering details about:
- Family Origins: Where their parents and grandparents were born, including the specific cities or villages and what those places are like.
- Life Journeys: When and why their family came to Australia and how they earned a living.
- Language and Faith: The languages their family speaks and the religious beliefs or practices they follow.
- Traditions: Special foods, clothing, holidays, and celebrations that are unique to their culture.
Strengthening Their Sense of Self
You can help a child explore and take pride in their identity by recording their personal experiences, such as:
- Personal Memories: Celebrations or cultural events they have taken part in and what they remember doing.
- Home Life: The languages they spoke at home and the foods or places they enjoyed with their family and community.
- Early Years: For children born overseas, recording how old they were when they arrived and their favourite games or friends from their first home.
- New Beginnings: Their first experiences and memories after arriving in Australia.
Where to Find Information
Building this story is a collaborative effort. You can find information by speaking with:
- The child and their family: Listen to the child’s memories and talk to their parents or relatives.
- Community guides: Reach out to religious leaders, community members, or local cultural organisations.
- Professional support: Your caseworker, multicultural specialists, or teachers can often provide context.
- Resource hubs: Check with your local council, Multicultural NSW, Settlement Services (Migrant Resource Centres), or your local library.
- Cultural Calendars: Use a Calendar of Cultural and Religious Dates to stay informed about upcoming significant events.